joy

Holidays are a time of joy--joy expressed through thanksgiving and hospitality.

And yet sometimes over our holidays, mingled with our joy and gratitude, is the shadow of grief.

Our focus can turn from God's goodness to our suffering, or the afflictions of those dear to our hearts.

That is how I was looking ahead to the holiday season. On the one hand planning the guest list and menu, on the other bearing some heavy burdens.

I received a package from Dayspring with a home decor item to review on my blog. When i opened the package, it was a large pedestal with the words around the top rim "TO LIVE WITH JOY IS TO SEE GOD'S GOODNESS."

The mango wood is beautiful, the pedestal shapely, and the message timely. The pedestal was a bit larger than I had imagined it would be, and I didn't want to put it on top of the table or any other high surface, so I finally settled on putting it on the floor next to the couch and using it for another table surface. I found a clear plate to put inside the top, and put a coaster on it. So while it looked large on the table, it looks delicate on the floor. :)

However, the message on it is the biggest encouragement. It reminds me of the goodness of God in the middle of difficulties. And when I start thinking of his goodness, then I start realizing how immense and numerous his blessings are.

Then I am full of joy.

guest posting

i have been invited to post for "christians under construction" today. i don't know how lisa and i connected, but i'm willing to give God the credit for introducing us through our blogs. she has been an encouragement to me on the days when i wonder why i'm posting my bare heart out here in public. as a sister in Jesus, i love her and thank God for bringing us together. also, i look forward to that day when we will meet in the presence of our Lord.

hope

in a moment of quiet
the desire for God,
for God himself
fills me,
a thirst that can be quenched
by no other.

in the night
i weep.
grief overcomes hope.

while difficulties multiply
some say,
“where is your God?”

the words pierce heart deep.

(click here to see the rest of the post.)

vision

Every human being is

“formed to be a spectator of the created world –

and given eyes

that he might be led to its Author

by contemplating so beautiful a representation.”

~ John Calvin, Commentary on Romans 1:19

copied from ann voskamp

visual

for the gift of vision
and for the pleasure of the visual
i am thankful
to the Creator.

for the beauty he made
in landscape
and flowers
and starlit nights
and peacocks and hummingbirds
and ducks and robins
and cats and stags. . .
and of the human form
i am thankful.

for the beauty-making ability
that he gave mankind--
for shapely sports cars
and tractors and the big machines,
for architecture
and carefully crafted furniture
and calligraphy and photography
and textile art and wall art
i am thankful.

for the pleasure of vision
and enjoyment of colors
and visual textures
and line and curve
i am thankful.

but the dark side of the visual,
the "lust of the eyes",
God warns of of this
and of coveting.
wanting beauty not intended for us,
heart desires that lead us to evil. ..
to lie,
to steal,
to adultery,
to dishonor our parents,
and worst, to desire
something more than the Most Satisfying.
oh, Father, do not lead us into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.

safety

"blessed are the pure in heart,"
Jesus taught his disciples.

also in the same discourse, he taught,
"if a man looks on a woman with lust,
he has already committed adultery
in his heart."

he traveled with these--
men being made pure in heart.

and one day
he was teaching in the temple.

a woman
betrayed by her lover,
condemned by the self=righteous,
shamed,
and thrown at Jesus' feet.

there at his feet,
in the presence of his disciples,
she found grace
to go,
and sin no more.

God's presence

sometimes we hear--
or say--
"where is God?
he seems so far away!"

however, the apostle paul,
speaking on mars hill,
"in him we live
and move
and have our being."

are we possibly
just taking him for granted?
are we so distracted
by things of lesser importance
that we are rudely unaware
of him?

he is here.

by his omnipresence
he fills this place with all he is:
love and righteousness,
grace and truth,
mercy and justice,
humility and sovereignty.

contentment

contentment:
satisfaction,
fulfillment,
gratification,
ease of mind.

but when i stress:
if only. . .
i should be. . .
i should have. . .
then i am revealing
the dissatisfaction
within my heart--
dissatisfaction
with myself,
my circumstances,
my relationships.

the apostle Paul said that contentment
was a skill he learned
both in abundance
and want.
he did it all through Christ,
who strengthened him.

john piper says:
God is most glorified in us
when we are most satisfied in him.

and the scripture commands us:
be content with what you have,
for He Himself has said,
"I will never desert you,
nor will I ever forsake you."
so that we confidently say,
"the Lord is my helper,
i will not be afraid.
what will man do to me?"

O, Lord,
i want to meekly receive this word,
grafted into my heart,
bearing fruit.
Thank you.

loved

the joy
is not in being loved--
as joyful as that is.

the peace
is not in the limitlessness
of that love,
though it is limitless.

the joy,
the peace,
are in knowing
the One who loves me.

request

dear Father,
please grant me a heart to know,
eyes to see,
ears to hear
the joy of your nearness.

small

i made a good play
in a game
on the computer.

"thank you, God!"

sincere gratitude.

but immediately i thought,
"how does God feel
when i thank him
for something
so
insignificant."

i felt embarrassed before him.

then i remembered
how he created
this perfect, tiny world
called earth
in the middle of a vast universe.

and on that tiny globe,
he formed ultra-miniature,
in-his-own-image
people.

then i smiled.

he would not mind being thanked
even for the smallest,
seemingly insignificant
things.

learning and discerning

worship yesterday was very good. the songs chosen were a blessing as we focused on God's love for us and Christ's sacrifice of himself in our behalf: the love of God, blessed be the name, how deep the Father's love for us, nothing but the blood, and Jesus paid it all.

pastor don julian preached from hebrews 5 -10 on Jesus being our priest, advocate and mediator. being reminded that we need a priest, an advocate, was excellent. also, being reminded that God has also made us priests, and that we should be going confidently to the throne of grace to intercede in behalf of others was good.

last night at a home fellowship, pastor mark worden led in a study of psalm 1, reminding us of the path of God's blessing. the testimony of the different ones who were there about how God's word sustains us and makes us fruitful was good also.

being part of a body of believers--flawed though we may be--is a great source of God's grace.

learning and discerning

i've been mulling over pastor don jullian's sermon from last sunday, "the sword of judgment and the throne of grace," all week.

my own take from the sermon was from a passing observation that on the ark of the covenant, covering the law and the budding rod of aaron and the bowl of manna that commemorated God's provision, was the mercy seat. the visual i received of God's mercy covering law and life and provision, and God's presence above all moved me to gratitude. i am so thankful for his mercy, and glad it covers all. i'm thankful for his law and the establishment of authority and provision, and for the shelter they find under his merciful presence.

monday my daughter reminded me of pastor don's application, expressing her desire to be a person demonstrating God's grace in our community, and she was able to practice what was preached in a difficult situation. as she rejoiced that she had an opportunity to do what she had heard, i was reminded of that emphasis as well, and the rest of the week i have had that on my mind as well.

oh, the the word of God examines even our smallest thoughts and our motives, but we can turn from it's bright, exposing light to our compassionate Savior, finding mercy and grace to help us be people of shining grace in our neediest times.

fret, part 2

so i hear about the gossip,
or the lie,
or see the grief of stolen loss--
but the wrong is not against me.
it is against another.

then i fret
and worry
about how my friend
or family member
will
survive
this.

my thoughts an endless
downward
spiral.

empty conjectures.
love-stifling fears.
unsatisfiable anger.

"do not fret because of evildoers."
the words of my loving Father intervene,
and because of the noise
in my soul,
and the self-justification
--"this angst is not for me,
it's because i care"--
he repeats.

then he repeats again,
until he has my attention,
and i try to obey.

grieve over wrong,
over loss,
over hurt.

don't fret about the wrong-doer,
the hurtful one.
o, my soul, trust in the almighty love
of your Creator and Father
in the behalf
of those you love!

he will work all for good.
when they are tested,
they will come through
like purified gold.

fret

so i hear the gossip,
or the lie,
or know the grief of stolen loss.

then i fret
and stew:

"how COULD he?"
"why WOULD she?"
"how could i have prevented. . ."
"how can i protect. . ."

my thoughts an endless
downward
spiral.

empty conjectures.
loveless fears.

"do not fret because of evildoers."
the words of my loving Father intervene,
and because of the noise
in my soul,
he repeats.

then he repeats again,
until he has my attention,
and i try to obey.

grieve over wrong,
over loss,
over hurt.

don't fret about the wrong-doer,
the hurtful one.
o, my soul, trust in the almighty love
of your Creator and Father.

he will work all for good
to those who love him.

overcoming evil with good

i read the article
on fear.
la de da.

and then a phrase reaches out
and hits me
between
the eyes.

“It’s really your ugly pride that makes you afraid. “Just bow in humility to rise up in courage.”


our place of winning
the war
against the darkness within,
always
a place of humility.

not groveling,
but a simple acknowledgement:
He is the potter,
i am the clay.

He is my power,
my strength,
my stability.

i can do
what He
has called me to.

learning and discerning

Pastor Don had spoken a week ago from Hebrews about being diligent to enter God's rest, and reminded us again of the importance of that. I really needed the encouragement.

Worship leader Ben Power reminded us that God is everything that we need and that we are dearly loved by him.

Peter Eldredge spoke about the conversion of Paul, and emphasized that all our ambition and personal power gets us nowhere in true holiness: Jesus is all we need.

Without coordinating the messages, the worship team had prepared to lead us in closing with "Above All".

During time with friends afterward, we (mostly I) received great encouragement to trust God to take care of people who are dear to us who are going through hard times.

I am deeply grateful for the Christian brothers and sisters God has placed in our lives through the years, and how they help us where we are here and now.

cold

"because iniquity shall abound,"
Jesus explained,
"the love of many will grow cold."

the statement repeats itself in my thoughts,
circling around
again and again
until i pay attention
and ponder it.

because iniquity abounds,
the love of many grows cold.

and within my soul an alarm goes off--
a flashing red light in the darkness,
an air-raid siren increasing the urgency.

i am warned.
the natural tendency of the many,
probably of all,
is to grow cold and loveless
as waves of betrayal and violence wash over us.

and i see,
first dimly,
then more and more clearly,
how the wrongs
against me,
against those i love,
against my acquaintances,
against people i only hear about through the news media--
oh, all of these betrayals and violations,
abrasive
and numbing
and callousing,
fill my soul until
i just
don't
really
care.

"oh, God, have mercy!
ignite my love to white hot fervor!
give me tenderness of heart,
a passion for mercy and justice.
give me stability of heart
to embrace the pain
of loving
even when iniquity abounds."

and the loveflame
on the smoldering wick flickers,
bursts into light,
and shines.

learning and discerning

this is the practical response to my post about preparing my heart to be a humble learner. the past three weeks, i have been trying to take something from each church service and sermon to reflect on throughout the week. i feel richer for the treasures i have been given.

three weeks ago, pastor don julian spoke from hebrews 2. some of his observations:

There is no way back, but only forward, in following Christ.

Jesus was crowned--not for lording it over us--but for suffering for us. (v. 9)

Jesus loves ans serves us, not just asking us to love and serve him--he is our inspiration.

two weeks ago, i attended the helena alliance church with my friend pam. her pastor, jim stumbo, spoke about pentecost. i'd never been in a church that celebrated pentecost and the coming of the holy spirit before. in speaking from acts 1:4-8, the pastor taught that:

Power is not in itself the entity that we seek. We seek God for himself, not some gift or something He does--and the Spirit himself is the power of God.

he also emphasized that the greatest power that we need is to overcome the darkness, the sin, within our own hearts.

i almost laughed when, after he had made a good point he said, "i don't really understand what i just said, but it's right there," and then pointed at the verse in his Bible.

how much of the truth that we affirm do any of us really understand? we see through the glass dimly, but one day we will see clearly.

the same day, i was able to listen to pastor don's sermon on hebrews 3 online after it was posted. it's a blessing, if someone has the time to listen to it.

and last week, when i was able to be home, mark preached the father's day sermon. of course, i always love his preaching. his emphasis on how God is a father--our example of the perfect father-- took us through the gospel of john. the passages he chose focused on jesus' life on earth, and those times when he and his father interacted.

i'm thankful for the opportunity to learn.

thankful

this was our father's day. . .

from mark's perspective

the gift of encouragement

Ever since I first discovered Dayspring, I have loved the way they communicate what is close to my heart. I carefully browse through the written message, mull over the included verse, and then check out the artwork to see if it seems to suit the person for whom the card is intended.

Even more dear to my heart are the many Dayspring cards that I have received from friends over the years, treasuring my friends' love and encouragement.

You can imagine my delight when I found that Dayspring would send me a free package of card if i would review them on my blog in conjunction with their June emphasis on encouragement! I chose a package of Bright Blessings cards. In the package is an assortment of greetings, including birthday, encouragement and comfort, and gratitude. The bright photography and graphics are a treat in themselves, but the spiritual emphasis, turning the focus to the Lord, is what really touches my heart.

relocated

for one month, i'm in helena, montana teaching cooking/adaptive cooking skills to adults who have lost or are losing their vision. my chief qualification is that i am legally blind. the next one is that i cook.

tomorrow afternoon the students will begin arriving on the campus that the montana association of the blind rents for this one month orientation program.

i want my light to shine before men, that they may see my good works and glorify my Father in heaven.

i would appreciate your prayers as being away from my husband, daughter, son-in-law, grandchildren, friends, and my own familiar surroundings is difficult.

thankfully, the Lord is always near.

it's friday

but sunday's coming. . .

i want to be ready.

i don't want to be a picky eater
when i sit down at a banquet of truth,
even though i may,
like the bereans,
check the scriptures to make sure
that i'm really taking in truth.

i don't want to be grading
the performance of the preacher,
as if he were my student
in a public speaking class.
i want to be a hearer of the word
and a doer of the same,
receiving with meekness
the engrafted word.

i want to learn,
asking questions
to the appropriate person
in the appropriate time and place--
not challenging the authority
or veracity
of the God-ordained leader,
not dragging out a personal issue
for public discussion,
but in humility
increasing understanding.

i want to begin
with a heart prepared to obey,
to live at unity God's people,
a desire to encourage others
to love and good works.

Father, please fill my heart
with a song of joy,
with generosity,
with reverence,
with humility.

Lord, have mercy on me.

life quest

when i was young and contemplated having a life verse, i couldn't really settle on one. but then my youth pastor spoke to us about the value of seeking wisdom as if we were searching for gold. he was animated about it's importance, citing a number of exhortations from solomon's writings in the book of proverbs. i was captivated by the passage:

[my father] taught me and said to me,
“Let your heart hold fast my words;
keep my commandments, and live.
Get wisdom; get insight;
do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth.
Do not forsake her, and she will keep you;
love her, and she will guard you.
The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom,
and whatever you get, get insight.
Prize her highly, and she will exalt you;
she will honor you if you embrace her.
She will place on your head a graceful garland;
she will bestow on you a beautiful crown.” --Proverbs 4:4-9

as my life seemed extremely difficult, i felt inadequate to do any good in my situation. How i yearned to know how God would want me to think and act! consequently, james 1:5 became precious to me: "if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him." many times i have called out to God to grant me wisdom, and he has never failed to grant my request.

in that special passage that encourages women to excellence, one virtue that is extolled is wisdom. "she opens her mouth with wisdom" we are told in proverbs 31:26. i want that too.

and moses, in the one psalm authored by him, wrote, "so teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom" (psalm 90:12). let it be so, dear Lord.

God's Goodness in Suffering

This message by Mark Talbot, All the Good that Is Ours in Christ: Seeing God's Gracious Hand in the Hurts Others Do to Us, was recently posted on John Knight's blog, The Works of God. I always find John's articles helpful, and was especially encouraged by this message by Mark Talbot this morning.

submission

"We're asked not to submit to fallible men but to Christ, the lover of our souls. And submission to Christ means liberation from necessity, circumstance, setback, envy, resentment, and eventually death. The wife-and-mother role looks small when married to a couch potato in a houseful of unappreciative kids. But what if Prince William asked us to marry him? And what if, instead of mindlessly popping out babies, we were invaluable links in a royal line? What's demeaning about motherhood, when the Lord of all creation chose to be a mother's son? What's the problem with being a wife, when the King of the Universe wants to marry us?

"True freedom is not obsessed with getting what's mine, but owning what is God's. Happy the woman (and man, for that matter) who can let go of herself and clutch even the hem of that royal garment."

Janie B. Cheney on World Magazine's blog today.

Leader

Charlotte Mason introduced me to the idea of "innate authority." In her observation of parents, she felt that some were either overbearing or negligent because they didn't understand that they have God-given, innate authority, and that a child may fight that authority but cannot overrule it.

In modern evangelical circles, many seem to have lost the idea of "innate authority" in relation to the husband's leadership in our homes. One may hear conversation assuming that a wife should let her husband lead, or that God has commanded men to lead, or that a husband can choose whether or not to lead. These assumptions find no basis in Scripture.

One scripture that alludes to a husband's leadership in the home is found in Ephesians 5. The passage reads:

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. (verses 22-24, ESV)

The command is to wives: submit to your own husband as to the Lord. The presupposition: the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church. His leadership is a God-given, innate position. He may do it purposefully or oppressively or negligently, but he is the only one doing it. The first example of man's accountability to God for his leadership is in Genesis, when God came into the garden after man's fall. He called Adam to give an account first. In addition, God holds Adam responsible for bringing sin into the world (Romans 5:12).

In the physical analogy, the head is the head. The neck or the heart or the arm doesn't "let" the head be the head. Each member of the physical body submits to the instructions and leadership of the head. If the body cannot or will not do what the head requires, there is some kind of dysfunction and disability.

Christ is the head of the church. Whether we totally understand the details of how this manifests itself, according to the passage in Ephesians, the true believers in Christ will submit themselves to Jesus Christ, obeying his will.

This is a wife's example. One's husband is her head. When did that happen? When she took vows before God and witnesses to be his wife. Maybe an individual woman excluded that from her marriage vows, but before God that is part of the essence of being a wife. Submission to her husband is part of her submission to God.

If a woman thinks that her husband can turn his leadership on and off, she will fall into some habits of dysfunction. She will assume that she can discern when he is leading, and when he is not. She may feel that there is a vacuum of leadership, a void that someone must fill. However, if she assumes that he is leading, she will be looking for the ways that he is leading. Once she has discerned the direction that he is leading the family, she will either respond critically, even rebelliously, or she will be submissive and supportive. Sometimes she will like the way he's leading. Sometimes she will not.

In responding a husband's leadership, a woman cannot always be "happy" with all the decisions he makes. Examine yourself:
*Am I unhappy just because I'm not getting my own way?
*Am I unhappy because he's following God and I don't like the sometimes difficult consequences of that decision?
*Am I unhappy because my husband is disobeying God, and I fear the repercussions of God's chastening?

If a wife is displeased and angry because she is not getting her own way, she needs to repent of pride and arrogance--of being self-centered--and ask for God's help to be more loving.

If a wife is fearful and upset because of the consequences of her husband's taking a strong position of integrity? Remember Job's wife? She must repent and love God more than she loves her own ease and convenience.

Is a wife discouraged and grieved because her husband is in clear disobedience to the word of God? Consider the following scripture:

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.(I Peter 3:1-6, ESV)

If your husband is disobeying the Lord, reflect on this passage prayerfully, asking God for wisdom to know how to respond and for the gentleness and tranquility of spirit that He Himself values so highly.

Sisters, let us take courage in knowing that we have the power of the resurrected Christ to empower us to be victorious in Him.

Dear Father, help us to see how our husbands are leading, to respect the manly leaders you have made them, to encourage them to be godly leaders, and to trust you even in the painful times.

what i need in five years

a greater love for God

a more unselfish love for others

contentment
in whatever condition i find myself

a growing trust in the Lord and His word

a more restful, willing obedience to Him

a willingness
to sell everything i have
and share it all with the poor

such complete dedication to the Lord
that whatever i do, i do for his glory

a bolder witness for Jesus Christ

less quenching God's Spirit,
more filling by him

more experience
knowing God and his word

ceaseless communication with my Savior

peace beyond understanding

unconditional joy

purity of heart

greater ability to make peace

rejoicing in mistreatment
and misrepresentation

knowing the fellowship
of the sufferings
of Christ

security,
stability
in God

this is just a beginning. . .

underground

back in september, through circumstances that we did not expect nor want, we lost both our income and housing. several sympathetic friends and family members offered us a place of refuge until we could discern our next move. however, our son-in-law invited us first, and his home was our first choice.

we gave away much, threw away much, stored some, and moved into the guest room.

mid-winter i was sitting in the guest room contemplating where we were and where we were going. at that point, life seemed a bit directionless. i looked up at the light coming in the window, wondering wordlessly about what God was doing at this season of our life. being dependent on our children at our stage of life is not a little humbling. we were still in transition without knowing where we were going to settle. a verse was spoken into my heart, "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit." (John 12:24)

i almost laughed. the guest bedroom window that i was looking at has a view of. . .well, the ground. the guest room in which we are staying is in the basement. we had, in a certain sense, fallen into the ground. our hopes and dreams for seeing a great work of God in us and through us in our field had died. the ministry in which and for which we labored seemed to have ended. my husband's vision of a body of believers putting down deep roots in the Word of God, sending effectual and fervent prayers heavenward, bearing hundredfold fruit--that vision faded.

throughout the winter the verse continued to pour out blessing on my heart and mind, a promise of future fruitfulness. i still smile every time i look at the guest room window, thinking about a grain of wheat in the ground. our time here has been a time of healing and growing. we have been able to spend quite a bit of time with our daughter and grandsons. mark has been able to start his own business, substitute at the high school, and move in the direction of bi-vocational ministry.

in truth, these have been some of the most beautiful months of my life. i have been nourished in the soil of unconditional love, unconditional joy, unconditional peace. i have been watered with the winter snows and the spring rains. now i feel the warmth of the sun on the soil around me. there is the power of new life within me from the source of Life, waiting with eagerness to reach toward the light.

Word

do you need:

renewed life in your soul?
wisdom for life's difficult situations?
joy for your heart?
clearer vision or more light?
something clean and enduring?
something you can trust
because it's true and right?

there is something for you,
something more desirable than the finest gold,
sweeter than the sweetest sweets.

(a response to psalm 19)

functionality

unconditional,
unselfish,
limitless
love.

joy
indescribable,
unquenchable.

peace
that passes understanding.

never-ending
patience.

kindness
unfailingly courteous
and respectful.

goodness,
pure and genuine.

faithfulness
marked by integrity and truth.

gentleness
with both the weak
and the harsh.

self-control,
shown in timely restraint
and timely productivity.

deliverance from dysfunction
is determined not by who is around me,
but by Who is within me.

right

plumb
level
square
in tune
in rhythm
correct the first time
not wrong
not wronging

God
is right
does right.

creation
right in its minutest measure
plumb, level, square.
right the first time
without trial and error,
without mistakes.

correct timing,
correct intonation.

always truthful,
always truth.

never wronging
anyone
any time.

i purely enjoy what is right and done right.

i purely enjoy God
most of all.

mountains

sometimes God moves them
with an earthquake
and a volcano's blast.

sometimes by erosion.

poured out

are you ready to be poured out as an offering?

i thought,
"i already have been
poured out.

"there is
nothing
left."

and then i realized
that it happens
again,
and again,
and again. . .

like the oil
from the widow's pot,
giving until all the other vessels,
large and numerous,
are full.

look

look around
and see the the wonder--
mountains and minnows
and aspen and wild rose.

look up
and see magnificence--
sunrise and sunset;
sun, moon,
and infinite galaxies.

look within
and see the miracle--
growth and perseverance,
sacrifices of praise
and hope
and impossible love.

look
and see
the fingerprints of God.

You Will Be Hated… (Are you?)

sometimes our persecution comes from within “the church”.

from the wolves in sheep’s clothing.

from the judas iscariot.

from the legalists.

just like jesus and paul.

one fears for the persecutors.

eternity is near.

(thanks for the food for thought, brother.)